May 2007

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This & That: Confession of a crazed wood hacker



Many years ago, a co-worker first upgraded my computer and then in time set up my new one. He wouldn't take any money. I pressed him as to what I could do for him.

In time, he told me that he had built a very large stand for his 100 gallon aquarium out of 2x4's and wanted to cover it with Cherry wood. He asked me to do this. We went together to several lumber yards where he carefully picked out the boards. The pieces were too large for me to cut so I asked Jamie Buxton to cut them to size. Then came the shock. I was asked to stain them a very dark Mahogany! I said that we could have gotten some pallets and made the covering and then paint them rather than spend all the money on good wood. He was adamant. He wanted stained Cherry.

Well 12 coats later, it was done. Bravely, I asked several woodworkers how best to put on a finish. I was just about kicked out and threatened with expulsion from woodworking. Finally, I was told to scuff the wood lightly and then put on the finish. I did that and some of the stain came off. Back to sanding all of the stain off. 12 coats later, it was ready and I put on the finish. It looked horrible! Back to sanding everything off again. 12 coats later, I gave the pieces to the person and told him to get them finished somewhere else.

After intense therapy, I gave up the idea of going into underwater basket weaving and have taken up wood hacking again.


Mark Rand